today's thought

today, as i was driving to my drawing class, i had a thought: i don't even know what it's like to bring a baby home - the joys and the struggles are completely foreign to me. in a strange way, this is a little gift of grace. i had been thinking that losing a firstborn must be harder than losing a second or third or etc born... but you know, it must be really hard to come home from the hospital with nothing when you know what it is like to have a child to hold. i think then, that it's just a different sort of grief. if my inexperienced arms felt empty and aching, i wonder what experienced arms must feel like...

i read Solomon's story about the two harlots who were fighting over one living child with a different perspective today. i suddenly understood the desperation of the mother who stole the living child after finding her own child dead. and of her angry heart as she told Solomon to "go ahead and divide the child between us" - perhaps knowing that if the other woman's child were also dead, at least she would have someone to grieve with - someone in the same situation. boy... i couldn't imagine that case being taken to court today with lawsuits etc. there would have been DNA testing and everything.

i am doing very well now for the last 4 days. yesterday, we found out that one of our guinea pigs (for husbandlove's first grade classroom) is in fact a male, and not a female, as we'd been told. so now, instead of expecting a little boy in September, we are to expect guinea pig piglets in November! what surprises!!!  (i sincerely hope that doesn't sound inappropriate - i do try to find cheeriness where i can!) and what a fun science lesson for his little first grade class! we had the best time laughing after the shocking discovery last night.