today as i drove to my art class, i saw a little boy, about 7 years old, standing on the corner of the road with his little hoodie on - his eyes sparkling under the shadow of the hood - with a lonesome, waiting-sort-of expression. he was so tiny and precious. as i kept driving, i passed a multitude of children walking to their elementary school. i realized that i would miss seeing my little boy off to school. it was the first of those feelings i've had. i've heard about them from other moms... where i realize that i'm missing out on my little boy's life events - yes, i'll be so overjoyed to (Lord willing!) see my other children off to school, but i miss this little boy!

i met husbandlove's student's mom in the grocery store today. she had two of her four children with her, and is pregnant with her fifth. she's due in December. she saw me and waved and came closer. i asked her about her pregnancy - she happily answered my questions, then mentioned quietly how she'd heard about my baby and she was so sorry. i nodded and thanked her. her eyes filled up with tears as she offered, "well, your weight is coming off quickly..." i smiled, "yeah, it's coming." she didn't quite know what to say, and if it was anyone else but her, i could have been offended. but i wasn't - somehow, in a very awkward way, she got across what she wanted to say, and somehow, i really appreciated her attempt.

it's quite amazing how much a death will mature us. i am very happy with the change the Lord has brought about in my heart since this summer. :)